Have You Met Your Inner Child?

i heart me

The moment I began to heal from my dark-night-of-the-soul was the moment I met my inner child.  She had the answers I had sought for most of my life – and once she felt safe enough to give them to me, huge waves of relief poured over me, and I literally began to relax into my life.

And, too, that was the moment that I realized that, for her, for this child part of myself, I was going to have to learn to love myself.  Because, in not loving myself, and in not living my life in line with what I deep-down knew to be true, I was betraying her.  And the thought of not wanting to betray this fragile child within me is what enabled me to begin to get strong again.

Because, you see, every single time I hated on myself – I hated on her.  And did she deserve that? Absolutely not.  She had already endured years of self-loathing – and that had to stop.  Believe me, it wasn’t easy.  And it took a long time.  There’s no quick  fix for years of abuse -self abuse or any other kind of abuse, for that matter.  It took dedication, time, and literally immersing myself in positivity.  With time and practise, I healed that spiral of self abuse.  And every single time I wanted to quit, or hate on myself, or tell myself the work I was doing was stupid or not important, I envisioned that tiny girl inside me.  Was she stupid?  Was she not important?  And I had to keep going – for her.

We all have an inner child, whether or not we call it that.  That child comes out when we are tired, stressed or angry, or have been triggered by something or someone.  I believe when we feel the purest joy, that’s our magical child inside.  Meeting and having a relationship with that child has been, for me, the most profound experience in my life.

Babystep:  Take out a picture of you as a child, if you have one.  (If not, remember yourself as a young child, picture her or him in your mind).  Does he/she deserve to be hated on?  Does he/she deserve to be told they are too ugly, or too fat, or too stupid?  If you were the parent of that child, how would you parent them – the way you longed to be parented?  Then do that.  Carry that picture around with you and every time you feel the need to hate on yourself, or tell yourself you’re not good enough, look at that tiny child.  And refuse to  abandon her, ever again.  Then choose love instead.  If you begin to do this consistently, your life will change. I know that from experience.


Wednesday’s Self Care Tip – Say NO!

saying no



Affirmation:  Today, I give myself permission to say NO to something I don’t really want or have time for.

Babystep:  Say NO.  Without fear, or guilt, or shame.  We  have the right to decline something, or someone, or some event or occasion.  Our time belongs to us-no one else.   Don’t be afraid to say no…sometimes it can be the kindness thing we can do for ourselves.

Tuesday’s Self Care Tip – Celebrate Your Imperfection



Affirmation:  I am imperfect.  AND in that imperfection, I am beautiful!

  How does the thought of imperfection make you feel?  For me, it was NOT ok to be imperfect.  To admit imperfection meant admitting I wasn’t good enough!

Babystep:  Give yourself permission to be imperfect.  AND be ok with it.

Monday’s Self Care Tip – Hugs!

how to love yourself

Affirmation:  I am loving.  I am lovable.  I am loved.

Babystep:  There are just not enough hugs in this world.  And if you’re like me, a single person, there  are, sometimes, no people around to hug or give a hug to!  So today, give yourself a Great Big Hug.  Stand in front of the mirror and wrap your arms around yourself and squeeeeeze.  Look into your own eyes and say…..(insert name)…..I LOVE You.  I really, really love you.  You are perfect just the way you are. Mean it.

Sunday Self Care Tip – Babysteps Will Take You There


Affirmation: One small baby step at a time will take me where I want to go.  All I need to remember is don’t stop moving.

Babystep:  Think of one thing you are trying to change…or adopt.  Take one tiny step in that direction.  Trying to be healthier? Choose to drink one more glass of water today.  Trying to quiet that inner critic?  Write yourself an affirmation and say it throughout the day.  One small step, that’s all you have to take.  These small steps begin to change your view of yourself.  These small steps begin to honour the self, and helps that self to begin to believe again. One small step, every day.  That’s all you need.

Saturday Self Care Tip – Take a Walk


Affirmation: Today I will move my body.  I will move my body because I love it, and because it longs to move regularly.

Babystep:  Take a walk.  5 minutes or more – down the street, around the block, in the forest, by the ocean. It doesn’t matter where.  Just get outside.  There is positive energy in nature that will lift your spirits.  Take time to notice 3 things in nature that are beautiful. Breathe.

Self Care Tip for Today


Tip:  Today, I will choose to treat myself with kindness, instead of with harshness.

Today’s Babystep:  Look into a mirror.  Look deeply into your own eyes and say – ……”(insert name), I love you, just as you are right in this moment. You Are Enough”.

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